I have been thinking about this post for awhile now. I want to write about love, but when I try to sit down and write it all comes out so Biblical and preachy. Sooo not my intention. When I think about love however, I think of the life of Jesus. I am not a church-goer, but I have always appreciated the teachings of Jesus. Jesus knew how to love unconditionally. It is so easy to say we love unconditionally, but few of us actually know what that means. Jesus was the icon for unconditional love, and it was frustrating for his followers because as human beings, we want love to be on OUR terms. We feel the love in our heart, but we want that love to be returned in the same format that we give it. Sexual love, intimate love, supportive love, occassional love, love of family, love of career, love of beauty and so on.
Truth? Love is wanting for the other person what they truly want for themselves. It is selfless. HOWEVER...you must find a way to combine this with the love of the SELF. And that is where this gets sticky. When you love yourself and love the other unconditionally, how exactly does that relationship work? Good question.
If the person you love has an issue such as "anger" and that person does not want to seek counsel to heal that anger, then that person has set his intention to be angry. Anger is what he/she wants. But you LOVE this person, and you want them to return your feelings, but it is not possible. What do you do? First you love yourself, and in return you love that other person unconditionally. Loving yourself means that you should probably take yourself out of harm's way and remove yourself from this person, but love them and allow them the intention they have set until they are ready to heal it.
Dang. How hard is that?
Our human tendancy is to cling to the other person and wish that they would heal the anger and love you in return...but we cannot control another, and if we truly love we will not try to control another. Imagine how hard this must have been for Jesus. Imagine how hard this must have been for his followers to understand.
It is SO MUCH easier to tell the person you love, "Why don't you call me more often?" "Why don't you buy me flowers once in awhile?" "Why do you hang out with your friends more than you do me?"
Yup. Being human is hard.
Anyway, I realize this is not one of my best posts. But the topic is on my mind, and truth is, it has been on my mind for 42 years.
Truth? Love is wanting for the other person what they truly want for themselves. It is selfless. HOWEVER...you must find a way to combine this with the love of the SELF. And that is where this gets sticky. When you love yourself and love the other unconditionally, how exactly does that relationship work? Good question.
If the person you love has an issue such as "anger" and that person does not want to seek counsel to heal that anger, then that person has set his intention to be angry. Anger is what he/she wants. But you LOVE this person, and you want them to return your feelings, but it is not possible. What do you do? First you love yourself, and in return you love that other person unconditionally. Loving yourself means that you should probably take yourself out of harm's way and remove yourself from this person, but love them and allow them the intention they have set until they are ready to heal it.
Dang. How hard is that?
Our human tendancy is to cling to the other person and wish that they would heal the anger and love you in return...but we cannot control another, and if we truly love we will not try to control another. Imagine how hard this must have been for Jesus. Imagine how hard this must have been for his followers to understand.
It is SO MUCH easier to tell the person you love, "Why don't you call me more often?" "Why don't you buy me flowers once in awhile?" "Why do you hang out with your friends more than you do me?"
Yup. Being human is hard.
Anyway, I realize this is not one of my best posts. But the topic is on my mind, and truth is, it has been on my mind for 42 years.
2 comments on the Moon:
It is also strange that their are some souls we meet that we can just naturally love this way. I have a friend Steve. We rarely talk and see each other since we live far away, but when I do see him or speak to him, I feel my love for him come out with out strings or demands. He is gay, and one of my oldest friends, but I don't have this relationship with any one else. I have always believed in his love for me, and I have always just loved him. No words or doubts. Why for him and no one else, I can not say. We are strange simian creatures and we don't know why we do what we do half the time.
Ah, well.
Lolita.
p.s. I love you too, Lisa, just in the normal more complicated way I love the rest of my friends! :)
This is very hard. It's what I am going through now :)
Post a Comment